- "Can you please shut up! For one F**king minute, I am asking nicely, please!"
- ―Glenn Cullen
The Care Home Lady was an unnamed character that made a small, brief appearance in Series Two (Portal:Series 2 characters) Episode 1 in The Thick of It when Hugh Abbot , Glenn Cullen and Robyn Murdoch pay a visit to a factory style workplace,
We first meet her when Hugh, Glenn and Robyn get out of a blue Jaguar XJ. Hugh starts introducing himself and shaking hands with the employees. The Lady approaches Hugh and asks if he knows what it's like to clean up his own mothers piss.
Naturally, Hugh gives her his sympathies and quickly tries to get away from her, however, Hugh is confronted by her once again, asking if that was his answer, In response, Hugh replies that he was the wrong person to talk to and that she needs to talk to someone at the Department of Social Affairs ( DSA, later known as DoSaC) and he would get someone to note her case.
Like a flick of a switch, she becomes very agitated, saying that nobody has noted her case. To try and calm the situation down, Hugh tries to calm her down by putting his hand on her shoulder, this did not help, she slapped Hugh's wrist and asks him what is he touching her for because he didn't want to know her, Hugh was in trouble, what started as a question about how the Social Affairs would do about a serious matter, had turned into a bitter conflict.
Once again, as Hugh tried to walk away, she once again follows him hurling abuse and comments at him asking him if he thought her mother pissing herself was a funny joke.
He eventually loses her, but then, predictably, whilst Glenn is talking to Hugh on the phone, The Care Home Lady strikes again as she confronted Glenn And has a rant at him asking if he realised how disgusting it is to clean up piss from your own mother and why he should do something to resolve her problems with the matter in hand, it got to a a point where eventually Glenn completely loses it, he asks her if she can " Please Shut up! For one F**king minute!, I am asking nicely!" Glenn tries to get back on the phone when In reply the lady asks if he had enjoyed his rant at her.
The whole visit, had now turned into a mess, it didn't help that Robyn had told the driver to have his lunch break when Hugh and Glenn desperately needed to leave before the lady ranted at them again, and when Hugh and Glenn got back to Social Affairs , the mess got worse...
Glenn and Hugh's phone conversation had been recorded and it was now on the news along with the whole mothers piss fiasco, Malcolm Tucker couldn't be more furious.